Exercise like Olympians

She's back!

2007-09-07T16:02:00.000-04:00

Yes, I am back from the world's longest vacation, which involved marrying my father! OK, officiating at my father's wedding. Doesn't have quite the catchy ring as the first sentence, though.

I'm still unpacking and processing, but I do want to let y'all know that Lindsay Lohan's Birkin is a FINALIST in the National 10-Minute Play Contest. So that's pretty rad.

I Rhythmballed at UMass-Amherst yesterday -- the baby liked it best when I dropped the ball, so he could go chase it. Quite the little retriever, he is!

Rhythmball is for everyone

2007-06-20T10:48:00.000-04:00

I've been taking some modern dance classes -- not because I want to be the next Martha Graham, but rather because I want to add an additional level of physicality to my Rhythmball practice.

In addition, I've received DVD media of Rhythmball being played by wheelchair users!

Some folks look at our videos and think, "I'm too much of klutz to do that stuff!" Well, I'm here to tell you, if I can do it, you can do it. Pretty much all you need to be able to do is swing your arm.

Want a free wheelchair-Rhythmball DVD? Email me!.

The Truth about May 15 Gas Out

2007-05-03T14:08:00.000-04:00

I've been in the e-mail game for a while now, and largely stay away from forwarded e-mails; most of my friends know not to send them to me. I get most of my e-mail from aggregate services. But when my father and Katie, two individuals as far as each other could be and still be human, both sent me the same

DON'T PUMP GAS ON MAY 15TH

e-mail within 24 hours of each other I realized it would be time to bring the thing to rest soon.

Carolyn sent it to me next, but with "The question ---- Does a Gas out really do anything?" I expediently conjured up snopes.com and sent its "MAY 15th GAS OUT: false" entry to her. She sent it to everyone on her list, giving me credit while also noting how speedily I'd managed it.

The moment before I logged in to BlogHarbor, I received a fourth version from my church in California.

People, please: If it really makes you feel better, remove your faded-to-white "Support our Troops" yellow-ribbon magnets and instead adorn your automobile with a car cover as many days a week as you can.

Another completed first draft

2007-04-25T21:52:00.000-04:00

I have all these first drafts and fewer second drafts, but for now I can live with that. Count of Three (formerly Anna And...) is complete and DH has read it and his biggest critique of it is that he "wants more" of it. For those of you who don't write plays, any time someone reads a first draft of your play and invokes Beckett and Sartre and the term "deeply philosophical," well, that's a good thing. I couldn't be happier. And now it's time for "Lost," which is just the icing on the cake. Huzzah!

Quiet around here

2007-04-19T16:46:00.000-04:00

Not much to say so I haven't been posting -- I'd hate to waste your valuable time. There was a recent study that Tai Chi helps seniors boost immunity to shingles, so I've been alerting reporters to the Rhythmball aspect of Tai Chi. Oh, and I'm in a play tonight -- an unstaged reading -- and the playwright has had me in mind for the lead ever since he started writing it, and my character is often referred to as "gorgeous," which is quite flattering to me, especially after my chili-dog-and-chocolate-cupcake diet this past weekend.

Good news is, the rain is mostly gone and it's supposed to hit seventy degrees this weekend. Now, if the baby would just stop whining, life would be perfect and I could take a nap or something.

I look cute!

2007-03-31T20:55:00.000-04:00

For the first time in a long time since I was pregnant, I look cute again. It's just happened within the past couple of weeks. And hooray, tonight I actually noticed that I looked cute in my underwear. Monstro agreed. Happy Saturday night! Shock the monkey, indeed.

Kathy Sierra

2007-03-29T15:43:00.000-04:00

I'm not sure what to think when I read a story online in the SF Chronicle about the Kathy Sierra death threats -- "...a world that many women in particular see as still dominated by men and where personal attacks often are defended on grounds of free speech" -- and at the bottom of the article is a Google ad for 99 Most Desirable Women.

The Bubblewrap is Gone

2007-03-23T21:35:00.000-04:00

The bubblewrap is gone. So are the bags and boxes of packing pellets. The tubes of Crazy Glue, the rolls of masking tape, vanished. Every clean garbage bag in the house? Ditto.

Monstro and Slash and the cargo van we rented are off to ICON. They successfully crossed the Long Island Sound via the Port Jefferson / Bridgeport ferry, and were looking for "a big sports building" at the SUNY where the con is being held when I called him on our cell phone.

Oh, and who wants to help me put together our new bed before hubby gets home?

ICON, Monstro, new bed

And yet MORE writing

2007-03-10T20:42:00.000-05:00

There's been this one-act I've been eleven pages into since 2004. Today I wrote 100% more. I think the first draft is nearly done.

The cool thing is, this one-act can be the prequel to another one-act play I've had some success with. And then I've got a two-act play, with an intermission act.

Whoo!

In other news, the baby is screaming, all excited about Springing Forward, I guess.

Happy Daylight Savings!

Best Website Ever

2007-03-06T12:40:00.000-05:00

... and addictive, to boot! Check it out! (G-rated and work-friendly, I promise)

Yup, more writing that isn't a musical

2007-03-03T13:03:00.000-05:00

I blame Anne for giving me a free idea, which dovetailed beautifully with an idea I had three years ago, topped off with another brand-new idea from moi. Basically, what I'm saying is, I'm writing a new play. I'm five pages into it. So far, it's not wretched. More info as I have it. In the meanwhile, I'm signed up for the first Playwright's Lab in April and looks like I'll be bringing this with me.

And, between the previously blogged stomach flu and Rhythmball (one of which was considerably more enjoyable than the other), I have NEVER looked hotter in my new jeans. Whoot!

And Yet Skinnier

2007-03-02T09:41:00.000-05:00

This week's poundage droppage wasn't inspired by Rhythmball so much as the gastrointestinal virus that Baby picked up, which 12 hours into his recovery Monstro and I inherited; yesterday was nothing but tag-team baby care and hot-racking the bed (a military term I learned from my old buddy Jim, who was in the Marines).

Monstro was setting the alarm last night. "Weird."

"What's weird?"

"The alarm is set for 8:12, and right now, it's 8:12."

It didn't at the time occur to me that 51 years ago, we'd have to wait another minute.

Hey "Out of Beta" Blogger.com

2007-03-02T09:39:00.000-05:00

If you're so "out of beta," why am I still seeing data transmitting from beta.blogger.com? Huh?

Skinnier all the time!

2007-02-27T13:25:00.000-05:00

Well, I'll admit that when we all had sinus infections after winter break my Rhythmball practice went by the wayside. But I'm back at it, plus my Lenten promise is to drink two liters of water daily, and woo hoo! Yesterday, I wore a size 16 suit that hasn't fit since before pregnancy.

Had a meeting with another client today, someone who hasn't seen me in a while, and he asked me, "How's Rhythmball?"

I threw my hands up over my head and said, "It's working!"

His response? "I can tell."

I am noticing more muscles in my arms -- long, lean ones -- and my waist is becoming more whittled. It's great motivation to keep going. So buy one already! And then get a paddle and ball for a friend, so you can keep each other honest. :)

rhythmball, skinny, milf

Happy Valentine's Day!

2007-02-14T20:03:00.000-05:00

I spent it snowed-in with Monstro and baby... not so terrible, that. But what do you get for the man who already got everything for his birthday the week before? Well, a knob for his desk drawer, for starters. And then, I learned one of his favorite songs on the guitar, recorded myself singing and playing it via my PowerBook, and burned it to a CD. Truly amazing. I rock. Happy V-Day!

Happy Birthday Monstro!

2007-02-07T12:54:00.000-05:00

My darling husband Monstro has a birthday today. Hope it's happy, sweetheart!

Totally Cool

2007-01-27T09:11:00.000-05:00

First off, at playwright's lab, the facilitator asked me if I'd bring in anything in a few weeks, and Sarah (fun and TALENTED) said, "How about another funny little thing? Or your Mormons again?" My saga of exchange students in an SLC laundromat was read way back in October.

Two: because the stage manager of a local theater that considered my Mormon laundromat play for an unstaged reading was visiting Lab for the first time, and I got to ask him for comments (another Lab member sent me e-mail saying if my play'd been accepted, I'd know by now), and he took a breath, screwed up his face, and said, "The thing I couldn't get my head around... was the set. I couldn't imagine all those laundry machines."

The set? That's it?? I already knew that part was problematic and told him so. "This was an early work, and ever since I've written for primarily black-box settings. So, what should I do about this one?"

"Add a director's or producer's note of, 'it's a laundromat.'"

He also didn't understand why it had to take place in a laundromat and I gave him my on-the-spot rationalizations of "I needed an unlikely setting within an unlikely city with two unlikely teenagers; I needed a place where the characters would enter metaphorically dirty and come out clean."

I didn't feel the need to beat him over the head with the overarching baptismal symbolism.

Anyway, once lab was *finally* over I talked to him again and made him laugh about how self-involved I was and then said, "aren't we all," and I asked him to reconsider my Mormon laundromat based upon his suggestions. And I think he might have nodded.

So we'll see about that one.

Another aspect might be that they're looking for three-acts, "a full night of theater," and I haven't written that long yet. I've thought about adding a bonus post-laundromat dinner-party act for the same characters plus the parents. Maybe. (Then I could split it in to a Pilot and First Episode and sell 'em to HBO or that cable channel that runs the new DeGrassi series. Hmmmm...)

I'm thinking more about my "I could only write it as a screenplay" idea and think I have it worked out for the stage, at least for the set (I've learned my lesson! I've learned it!). And three acts would be good, because I see this as a particularly beginning-middle-end piece that'll need some room to breathe.

*And*, also Totally Cool (see title), last night for Anne's birthday I wrote a poem, something I've not done for years, which is funny because Anne and I met at Carolyn Kizer's graduate *poetry* workshop -- Anne was a lock for it; I didn't make the cut. I think I culled all the extra words out of this one. Happy birthday Anne!

**AND***, coolest of all cool, this week we received Rhythmball inquiries from Canada, Prague, and Australia!!! Let's go global, people! :)

Poem: 1/26/2007

2007-01-27T08:55:00.000-05:00

Our coldest night of
three Massachusetts Januaries:
We eat b-b-q chuck and corn on the cob
till the butter grows muddy.

Rhythmball for Rehab

2007-01-26T09:45:00.000-05:00

My friend Katherine just had major surgery on her leg and is in a cast the size of Italy. She asked if I thought Rhythmball might be beneficial to her recovery, and my answer is a resounding "yes!" Katherine's a real go-getter, hike till dark then hike some more sort of gal, and I can't imagine her being still. The good news is, while she's still in her cast, she can play Rhythmball while seated. I'd recommend she buy a few extra balls to ease the retrieval process, though. Rhythmball is a great aerobic exercise for people confined to chairs, because it gets your arms moving. Super for circulation -- do you ever see fat orchestra conductors? Of course not! Because flapping your arms is super exercise! But Rhythmball is more fun, plus it has the added "will I keep it on the racket" surprise factor.

So Katherine, yes! Please try Rhythmball and let us know how it helps your recovery!

And scratch Miss Gigi, your darling poodle, who I'm certain is VERY happy to have her mother stuck in one place for large periods of time.

Our Two Cats are Hopeless

2007-01-23T22:14:00.000-05:00

We have a mouse. Two cats, and a MOUSE. In the same kitchen where they eat their food. 'nuff said.

P.S. Cats pictured do not belong to us

black cats, unhelpful

Happy New Year!

2007-01-04T13:04:00.000-05:00

I am back from California where I visited family and chased the baby around various grandparents' and aunties' houses, thereby ensuring, if not improving upon, the level of fitness I'd achieved via Rhythmball. Never know how handy baby gates are until you spend three weeks without them. Anyway...

We are all sick, including baby, who has not one but TWO sinus infections, which is totally unbelievable because he's the same happy, sunny boy he always is. Katie suggests he might be "stupid," which is completely not true and, frankly, has somewhat ticked me off.

I guess the really bad news, however, is that I have an idea for a new writing project, and it will have to be a screenplay, which is a major bummer because for me, screenplay writing is the most horrific type of writing there is, just flat-out a pain in the rear, and so difficult, and I'm cringing at the thought of it.

My dad bought Darling Husband a "write a novel in a month" box set. Maybe I'll appropriate it and bang through this screenplay in 30 days.

We'll see...

Serving Bessie: It's a Hit!

2006-12-04T20:03:00.000-05:00

I read my new one-act, Serving Bessie, at the Mytown Playwright's Lab this evening and it was a big fat hit. Woo hoo! I was a little nervous -- see, I live in this uber-progressively liberal town in Western Massachusetts, and wasn't certain that the Lab members would find humor in a play whose premise is "a vegan and a Jersey cow are trapped together on a desert island" -- but there were chuckles throughout and they loved the ending. They all agreed that it didn't need to be any longer, and they all thought it was plenty funny ("It's one joke," Sarah said, "but it's a really funny joke."). Hooray! Toby said it was a "short little funny arc thing," which cleared my apprehension that the vegan character might be too one-note.

So I just got home and popped the bottle of Gloria Ferrar Brut sparkling wine that I just happened to buy the other night, and it tastes like victory. Hell yeah!

Serving Bessie, Western Massachusetts, artistic freedom

Well, Serving Bessie is Done...

2006-12-03T19:41:00.000-05:00

Just finished the first draft. Two pages, solid, funny. At least, Avram kept giggling during our over-the-phone read-through, and then said not to change a thing.

So I'm saying it now: my brand-new one-act, Serving Bessie, is ready for a public reading. Perhaps I'll trot it out in front of the Mytown Playwright's Lab next week. If it plays for them, I'll be happy, 'cause they're a pretty politically correct group and this play? It's sick as hell. As promised. Tee hee hee!

Serving Bessie, seeking representation, sick as hell

New Play's a-Brewin'

2006-12-03T17:37:00.000-05:00

I had a great time at a tea party yesterday. It was disclosed fairly early in the afternoon that I write plays, which worked out great, because when one woman said something that made me go, "ooooh!", she gave me permission to write about it before I even had to ask. I had the ending by the time I drove home, and the structure before I went to bed. I allowed Monstro to offer suggestions and listened quietly, then dropped the ending on him a couple of hours later. Can't remember the last time I heard him laugh that hard. So, off to a good start. Now I just have to write the thing -- preferably in time for the next tea party.

Working title? Serving Bessie. Will it be funny? Hell yeah. And totally sick.

playwright, one act, totally sick

Down Another Size!

2006-11-27T21:35:00.000-05:00

My tighter size 18 pants are fitting better, but the thing I'm most excited about is I've dropped another panty size! This is great news for me, because I gained so much butt weight when I was pregnant it was difficult to tell whether I was coming or going. Really. And though I'd put away my maternity undies a couple of months ago, I couldn't budge out of my first-trimester bikinis. This morning I was digging through my underwear drawer looking for clean, uh, drawers. The only ones I could find were the black ones that, three weeks ago, cut off all circulation to my lower extremities and made me look like the Michelin man after too many four-star meals. And yet today, they fit, felt great, didn't ride up, and were perfectly comfortable. This is particularly impressive due to the fact that in the past week I've consumed baby's first-birthday cake, a wedge of Brie, and at least an entire pie. Thanks Rhythmball!

Never thought I'd be talking about my unmentionables in a blog but hey, now that they're smaller, I've got something big to blab about! Whoot!

Oh, and by the way, don't ever type "black panties" into Google Images, unless you want to see a guy with a hairy beer gut sporting pink satin panties, which you probably don't. Trust me on this.

panties, weight loss, laser hair removal

Fundamental Rhythmball available free!

2006-11-20T20:34:00.000-05:00

Hey, I published the Rhythmball manual today.

Xiaofei Sui, Germany's resident Rhythmball expert, did the bulk of the work, having already written version 1.0. It was a great project, translating his original work and adding my own spin on some of the topics, with his blessing. If you're already playing Rhythmball, Fundamental Rhythmball will help you fine-tune your grip on the racket. Xiaofei has also included two warm-up and cool-down exercises to underlie your game.

Click here for the download page. You'll need Acrobat, aka Adobe Reader, 'cause it's a .pdf document... And don't forget to set your printer prefs to "landscape" mode.

Rhythmball, Fundamental Rhythmball, Xiaofei Sui

Do you know David Cutler?

2006-11-15T15:47:00.000-05:00

David Cutler and I are survivors of the same Intermediate school: I went to his bar mitzvah, and at lunchtime we hung out in the Student Store. David played a LOT of piano back then and accompanied my eighth-grade talent-show act, "A Sucker Born Every Minute" (from Barnum). He even improvised some jazzy chords behind my patter. Good stuff.

Last night he was quick to note the more-than-20 years since last we spoke. He thought my e-mail came from another woman who shares my name, with whom he worked in another state. As such, his surprise upon seeing MY name was total. He was likewise astonished that my son is closer to our age back then than we are now.

My surprise was in his e-mail last night when he asked if I knew of Billy Collins, US Poet Laureate 2001-2003. "Not only am I versed in his poetry," I wrote back, "but I have MET Billy Collins, at a pre-reading party at Alan Soldofsky's house in San Jose, CA. I was wearing my most vivid turquoise cowboy boots that night, about which Mr. Collins complimented, 'Nice kicks.'" Anyway, David just composed music for some of Collins's poetry.

David Cutler is the BIG TIME, and proved it immediately. "A musical. Big project," he said. Smart, that one. It took me a year to see it. He travels all over, plus he's up for tenure at the university where he's taught for six years. Not much time, that one, but a little.

"Frankly," I told him as we spoke an hour ago, "I'd be happy just to hear if you think it's funny." And he seemed pretty open to that. The fact that I've been noodling on this for two years should let him know that this is not necessarily a "fast-track" project. I told him the backing, musically, I'm considering for the piece. He told me the backing, financially, I should secure for this creative stage, thereby lending prestige to the project. Living in Western Mass, in the Five Colleges Area, with the Berkshires and Tanglewood the next county over, I believe that it is possible to go to Broadway with this.

I believe that "Liz" (that's my blog-o-riffic working title, never you mind) will hit Broadway and smash it a new one.

But first I need to get the backing to bring in David Cutler. A big fat grant. And maybe a tip jar. And DEFINITELY a meeting with Ben Zander.

David Cutler, Liz, Billy Collins, Benjamin Zander, me

Emboldened by my Recent Success

2006-11-14T20:02:00.000-05:00

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin was met so favorably, and I'm still riding so high from it, that not only will I submit it to Berkshire Fringe, but I just e-mailed David Cutler and asked if he'd be interested in scoring my musical. 'Cause you gotta grab the bull by the horns while the iron is hot, baby!

David Cutler, Lindsay Lohan's Birkin, oh please oh please

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin Debuts!

2006-11-09T00:08:00.000-05:00

We opened the show and we kicked some butt. The girls were great, they missed half a page of dialogue but they otherwise were so good that nobody noticed. During the talkback (they'd already left by that time), I mentioned how wonderful the actresses had been and the room burst into spontaneous applause. People laughed and it was so much fun. We came home with two friends and drank pink champagne. What a great night!

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin: e-mail between playwrights

2006-11-04T17:03:00.000-05:00

My e-mail inbox parlayed the following exchange to me, in the form of a question from one playwright for Wednesday's reading and the answer from another.
* * * * *
Sarah wrote:
Hello Everyone,

Someone at my work wanted to bring his 9 year old daughter to the reading and I was wondering what age level you all think the plays are at? Obviously, each child is different but I was just wanted to get a general sense.

For my play, I'd place it at a PG13 or so. There is some violence (implied because it's a reading) which might be upsetting. It might be fun for younger child because there is a made up language.

- Sarah

Lynne replied:
I would say at least pg-13 for mine -- they have to be okay with descriptions of sex between lesbians

* * * * *
I love my town. Actually, two of the four plays feature lesbian content. Fifty percent? That's about right for this city.

In deference to full discosure, I responded, "Mine is G-PG, more for the dialogue than anything else.--LBJ."

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin, lesbianism, Smith College

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin: clarification

2006-11-04T16:11:00.000-05:00

Just to be clear in the later post (either above this or below this, depending upon whether you read this chronologically or counter-chronologically), the playwright named "Lynne" is not I. Of four of the participants, three are named some derivation of "Lynn." My funny husband suggested we call the evening, "Night of 1,000 Lynns and one Sarah." Heh heh heh.

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin: All we need is rehearsal

2006-11-03T14:40:00.000-05:00

This week, Lynn learned that when opting for verisimilitude, one doesn't always know what one is letting one's self in for...

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin has a cast list of two teen girls. That's all. And considering that in my day, you couldn't get a teen girl off the phone, I figured I'd hear from them the moment they read the cast list.

Not so, Sherlock.

I finally drove to their high school, hours before my in-laws arrived from out West. I'd spoken with the administrator that morning, and he'd assured me that scripts could be delivered to the girls in class. Once I arrived, babe in arms, and asked if I could stay for confirmation that the girls had taken possession of said envelopes, he just looked 'em up and called them out of class.

I'd been a bit frantic at the cross-communication, so once I laid eyes on my cast, my shoulders came down from my ears. One girl had forgotten to tell me she was in a show starting Friday, so that helped me understand the underlying issue a bit. And happily, they're both taking classes at the school where I'd reserved rehearsal space, so they 1) know where that is and 2) will both be in class there Monday afternoon.

We're rehearsing Monday evening and Tuesday afternoon. Our show? Wednesday.

Oh, and the other actress just called to say she's touring college campuses, and won't be back for Monday's rehearsal. I gave her some notes over the phone and asked her to think about costuming. I also told her to tell her co-star I expect to see HER Monday night.

I've never directed by proxy, but damned if I'm not getting good at it.

Did I tell you we're FIRST on the program? And yes, there will be a program. I double-checked the actresses' names before sending in the information.

As a theatrical warm-up, DH has to re-read "Endgame" for class Tuesday afternoon, so last night we read it aloud. He was Hamm and Nagg. I was Clov, Nell, and Nagg (whenever there were Hamm and Nagg exchanges.)

It's funny to me, to think that the Hamm/Clov relationship in that play mirrors the James Joyce/Samuel Beckett relationship when Beckett was Joyce's secretary (as the latter wrote _Finnegan's Wake_). Or maytbe it's just about the apocalypse:

Clov:

That's on page four and it says it all, I think.

And, on the bright side, at least we won't be over-rehearsed. And I'm having plenty of time to spend with hubby's folks!

Lindsay Lohan's Birkin, directing, teenagers

Baby Walked November First

2006-11-02T14:04:00.000-05:00

He took three side-steps toward me that morning, and seven forward steps that night, trying to get a glass of red wine away from my mother-in-law.

Auditions Today and Rhythmball, too!

2006-10-25T20:20:00.000-04:00

I held auditions for "Lindsay Lohan's Birkin" today at the local performing-arts charter high school. Six young ladies auditioned, which was a good number -- I had everyone read twice, mixing up the casts. Nevertheless, the true Heather and Hillary shone through and I believe my decision was sound. Happily, one of the girls who auditioned is in the directorial class, so I'm hoping she'll be interested in helping / taking over director-ship of the play.

The head drama honcho even suggested a theater festival that might be interested in the script. Whoo! I came home and googled it -- turns out the deadline is next week, which couldn't be more fortuitous.

And yes, I'm still finding the time to Rhythmball. I'm cautiously moving on to the advanced sets, having spent these months perfecting the basic sets both right-handed and left-handed. My first "trick" is the 360-degree racket spin while the ball's up in the air. I can do it better left-handed than right, right now. Go figure.

It's hard trying to convince people that they should plunk down their hard-earned cash for an exercise they've never heard of, but I believe our stream of orders is about to turn into a river. You can help by breaking down and clicking here and buying it. Tell you what: If you enter "Rhythmball blog" in the order form's "How did you learn about Rhythmball?" field, I'll throw in an extra ball for free. Very helpful to have two balls when you're first learning -- I swear I spent more time the first day digging under the futon than actually swinging my arm.

But don't be scared; Rhythmball is like snowboarding. The first day is horrible and you despair that you'll never get the hang of it. The second day goes a little better. By day three, you're clickin'.

rhythmball, lindsay lohan's birkin, weight loss

Media Maven Madness

2006-10-23T09:07:00.000-04:00

First off, on a personal note: My new play is being staged! It was chosen for the first-ever public reading of the Mytown Playwright's Lab, and will be staged as such on November 8th. It is called "Lindsay Lohan's Birkin" and I'm auditioning actresses and a co-director this week. Can't freaking wait.

In other news, Rhythmball will be featured in Volume 30/Issue 4 of "Activities, Adaptation & Aging." You might also be seeing it in the print home of the Manolo! (be still my heart). And another HUGE newspaper might be covering it, but I can't say the name here for fear of jinxing it.

Finally, we've edited together all the Rhythmball content from "The Amazing Race." If you have a high-speed connection (cable modem/DSL or higher), check it out here.

That is all. But, for a Monday, not bad! Not bad at all!

The Amazing Race, Lindsay Lohan, Hermes Birkin, media goddess

Down three sizes in three months!

2006-10-18T11:40:00.000-04:00

It's official -- I am down to a 16/18 from a 22/24 (it was a really tight 22) in three months, WITHOUT DIETING. I'm serious about that "without dieting" part. I'm a new mom. I live for chocolate and am not about to deny myself such a small thing that makes me sooooooo happy.

But on the sizing front, my in-laws just sent me a box of clothes, because they love to shop and are gracious and generous people, and all of the size-18 pants they sent FIT. Even the two pairs of Tommy Hilfiger jeans. And they look great. Darling Husband was ticked off at me the other night, and yet still managed to notice "a little bit" that I look hot in my new jeans.

My energy level is up, my strength level is up, and even our sex life is improving. But more about that in another post, one likely to be entitled, "Too Much Information."

The Amazing Race, no diet, chocolate, improved marital relations

Macintosh OS/X 10.4.8

2006-10-02T21:12:00.000-04:00

I just rebooted after loading the newest Mac OS, 10.4.8. And it took so long to load I thought my hard drive was gone. Let this be a warning, nay, advisement to any of you running OSX.

That is all.

Rhythmball's National TV Debut

2006-09-20T22:34:00.000-04:00

So, you missed The Amazing Race on Sunday and didn't see Rhythmball featured thereon? Have no fear, hearty readers:

First clip
It starts at 2:41, then picks up again at 6:27 to about 7:05.

Second clip
Picks up at 3:34, goes to about 4:09, then picks up again at 4:22 through 4:40

Third clip
2:46 through 3:09, then again at 3:17-3:29

The Amazing Race, Amazing Race, season 10, bai long

The Amazing Race Season 10 Premeire

2006-09-18T13:42:00.000-04:00

Rhythmball was featured as the "Leisure Detour" on last night's season 10 premeire of "The Amazing Race". Guess the producers know a great exercise when they see one!!!!!!

The Amazing Race, Amazing Race, season 10!

Goin' Shopping

2006-09-15T09:54:00.000-04:00

So baby and I went shopping yesterday, to help lift our tired-of-the-rain spirits, get baby his first pair of shoes, and make a lil' dent in the university finanical aid check that came this week (thanks, UMass-Amherst!). We started at JoAnn's as I'm itching to make a new skirt, but baby started screeching so we wheeled out of there in a hurry and went to Target, where my Anne Klein heels made obscene squeaking noises on the tile floor. Ventured over to the shoe department because of baby's aforementioned need and my desire for a hot pair of boots. I'd seen a link to some Issac Mizrahi kicks on The Blog of the Manolo and was itching to try them on.

Shoes have been a big deal to me lately. After having baby, my feet grew and so none of my shoes fit anymore. It wasn't such a problem this summer as sandals and Birkenstocks are pretty forgiving, but the rain hasn't been very Birk-friendly, so I've been combing Zappos for sales. And now Target.

I found the boots and noticed that they featured a "stretch upper." Now, my pre-Rhythmball calf would have pushed that upper to the limit. Who am I kidding -- it would have busted the teeth out of the zipper like kernels of corn off the cob. It put the "calf" in "calf." But now? No problem to zip those babies up! And they look amazing! I celebrated by adding a croc-stamped black stiletto pumps to the boots atop baby's stroller, then picked up a pair of trainers for DH so I could justify the expense, and a cute pair of lion-head slippers for baby.

Buoyed by my boot success, I stopped in a the women's wear section and a black suiting jacket caught my eye. I tried on the 20w and it was HUGE on me. Hardly daring to hope, I slipped on the 18w. Too big!!!! Not only could I button it but it positively gaped on me. I gaped back. :)

Tried on a 16 in the "non-fatty" department and it was too tight, but I could at least slip it on.

I don't have a scale because they make me crazy. My ever-loosening wardrobe has been evidence enough. And maybe the women's wear at Target is "sized for egos, not people" (my favoritest "Six Feet Under" line ever), but who cares! The 18 was too big!!! Thank you, Rhythmball, for being fun enough to keep me active, and useful enough to help me with my weight-loss goals.

Tar-zjay, weight loss, Rhythmball works!

Spring 2007 Fashion Report

2006-09-13T15:40:00.000-04:00

Y'all probably have too much of a life to be TIVO-ing "Catwalk Nightcap" on Style, so I'm doing it for you. This is a show that features the runways of Olympus Fashion Week, currently being held in New York City. Here is my recap after two days' worth of runways:

Best designs: Carolina Herrera. Baby couldn't tear his eyes away, got up into a kneeling position and clapped. I think I agree with him, though Reem Acra's pretty sparkly and shiny.
Most hideous dress: Reem Acra featured some black gray burlap monstrosity with puffed sleeves. Poor girl looked like a cross-dressing linebacker at his mother's funeral.
Most hideous collection: Sass and Bide. Gack! Bonus points for one of the models nearly falling on her skinny ass while making her turn. (If you don't think I rewound that three times, well, you don't know me very well.) To top it all off, the designers themselves look like Edina and Patsy, not exactly the people I'd want to style me.

Trends
#1: Belts. Big belts, little belts, all cinched at the waist.
#2: Empire Waistlines. Time to look like the characters in Sense and Sensibility. Babydoll dresses are in, in, in.
#3: Straplessness. Or any other type of neckline that will require a strapless bra, or, in the case of some keyhole and other plunging designs, no bra at all.
#4: Floaty hemlines. Looks like dresses will flow away from the body, in a way that made even the most anemic model look hippy and thick-thighed.

Don't have a waist? Have to wear a bra? You've got seven months to get Rhythmballing before it'll be time to wear these fashions.

It's certainly strengthened my resolve, I'll tell you. I've ordered a size 18 dress to wear to Sean and Kristen's wedding the second week of October and at this rate, I'm hoping it'll be loose. And it will look BEAUTIFUL with the new gold-leather Enzo pumps I've ordered from Zappos. Woo-freakin'-hoo!

fashion week, skinny-ass models, project runway

Lowered Weight, Raised Confidence

2006-08-31T16:43:00.000-04:00

Well, the weather has perked up a bit and my mood, likewise. Getting back into the Rhythmball "swing" (little pun there) of things and wondering why more people aren't giving the sport a try. I think it might have something to do with lack of confidence.

It's funny -- we Americans have this reputation of being brash and self-confident, but when it comes to athletic abilities that brashness goes right out the window. I was talking to a certified personal trainer this week, telling him about Rhythmball. He hopped online and looked at the Rhythmball home page. This is a guy who does martial arts and is in top physical condition, and yet his first impression upon seeing the little movie on the home page? "Wow. I could never do that."

Why is it that we're raised to believe that we can do anything, and yet inherently doubt our own physical abilities? I'm no Martha Graham -- in fact, if I were a celebrity (working on it) I could be in a show called "Falling Down with the Stars." And yet, I managed to keep the ball on the Rhythmball paddle consistently after only one practice session, and had most of the first set of tricks mastered after only two or three go-arounds.

It's not that hard, people! It can even be done sitting down if you want to start off easy or are a "wheeled" individual (in fact, Rhythmball was originally developed to help people in wheelchairs improve musculature, circulation, digestion and more). And now the box of new clothes my mother-in-law sent me are mostly too big, which is continuing to bolster my confidence. It's well worth the $30 (ok, $29.95 plus shipping and handling) if you're looking to improve not only your body, but your outlook and, hey, even your physical confidence! I haven't tripped over my own feet in weeks. It's a beautiful thing. And it's totally fun, too. But that's for another day. Time to go Rhythmball!

Rhythmball, self confidence, adaptive recreation

Rhythmball Benefit #49

2006-08-29T20:04:00.000-04:00

My friend Kris came over for a visit today with her seven-month-old baby, Eli, who has eyes so blue they look purple. I have a soft spot in my heart for Eli because he weighed even more than MY baby did at birth -- my kid was 9 lbs. 4.5 oz, and Eli was 11 lbs. 7.75 ounces. Yowza.

I let Kris settle in before sweeping her baby onto my lap, where I bounced him for a little while until he got restless. I stood up to hand him back to his mommy and he practically floated up to the ceiling.

"Kris," I said, "he's light as a feather!"

"Lynn," she replied, "he's 21 pounds!"

Which makes me wonder how heavy he'd feel if I hadn't spent the last two months Rhythmball-ing and all last week helping Melanie move her shoes and makeup, and also makes me wonder how much my nine-month-old weighs. He goes in for his well-baby check this week. Anyone want to place some bets???

baby weight, baby games, baby please take a nap

Another sweat-inducing activity

2006-08-28T08:29:00.000-04:00

Last week I announced that only canning is as sweat-inducing as Rhythmball. I'd like to revise that statement, having spent all of last week helping a Southern woman move. I usually don't rely on such generalizations but having spent hours packing her 1) makeup and 2) shoes, I belive the designation is important. We must have packed eight tall cartons of shoes. Eight! And of course they had to be split into "Fall shoes," "Winter Shoes," and "Shoes" designations. Frankly, last week was all about sweating and designating. I packed her bathroom, pantry, and kitchen, plus made a trip to her storage unit to help load up two enormous trunks -- think "Rope" enormous. All this, and I still managed to get in two Rhythmball sessions. But after being the only person helping a Southern woman move all week, that exercise might have been a bit superfluous. My friend did, however, note that I'm strong. Good combination of Rhythmball and toting around my enormous baby.

And why was I the only person who helped her (save my DH who came on the last day)? Because she's lived in New England since 1998. She was feeling pretty bummed about the fact that none of her peeps came by, but I let her know that when our pastor moved this summer, DH and I were the only ones who helped him pack.

But that's another rant for another day, possibly on another blog.

motormouth, moving, shoes

Becky? Is That You???

2006-08-22T20:12:00.000-04:00

Can It!

2006-08-21T09:55:00.000-04:00

I have found the one activity more sweat-inducing than Rhythmball: canning. This weekend was all about putting fresh fruits and veggies into jars and processing them in a boiling-water bath. Hadn't done it for two years so I was a bit rusty, but nevertheless productive. Here's the count:

Peach-pineapple jam: nine half-pints, two pints
Mango salsa: six half-pints, four pints
Tomato butter: nine half-pints, 13 pints
Tomatoes: three pints, two quarts
Blueberry jam: six half-pints, one pint

Thanks to Carolyn from my church for the boxes of jars, and DH for watching baby both afternoons. I still have half a box of tomatoes, which I think will be turned into tomato salsa. And then I'll tear out all of my basil plants and make a mess of pesto, which I'll freeze. Yummmmmmmmm....

canning, sweating, compulsion

Huh.

2006-08-18T13:02:00.000-04:00

My blog is worth $1,129.08.
How much is your blog worth?

This blog has accrued more "interest" in two months than my other blog did in more than a year. Weird. Too bad I can't cash it all in and get me some liposuction. But that would be cheating, yes?

Speaking of liposuction, perhaps you've already seen one of my favorite Web sites. Or maybe not...

Technorati, Liposuction, Cheating

Month-and-a-Half's Progress

2006-08-15T15:02:00.000-04:00

Well, with the heatwave and everything, I'll admit I've not been Rhythmballing as much as I should. So I was a little concerned when I decided to go out and buy some new clothes the other day. I shouldn't have worried. The skirts I tried on in size 20 were all too big! They were supposed to fit around my hips but they just sagged. I tried on some 18s and was able to zip them up -- they fit around my waist, but as that's where I prefer to wear my clothes I was happy about it.

I was bummed when none of the tops fit, but was vindicated when I tried on a bra that was 2 inches AND one cup-size smaller than what I'd been wearing! When I got home, I tried on my pre-pregnancy bra with a size 38 band and it fit!!!! I'm wearing it today and it's sexy as hell.

The great thing about getting active is it's definitely improving my well-being in other ways... I'm drinking fewer alcoholic beverages and eating lots more vegetables. In my pre-Rhythmball days I'd go grocery shopping, dump out the rotten veggies from my refrigerator bin, put fresh ones in the bin, and repeat every week. Nowadays we're eating almost all the vegetables before they have a chance to go bad. I'm especially enjoying snacks of baby carrots dipped in spicy hummus -- low fat, with enough zip to make my taste buds happy.

I've also ordered a new instructional DVD. When I was beta-testing the original, I realized that it was in Chinese format! My TV wouldn't play it, but my multilingual Macintosh does, so I've been watching it on my laptop. But now that I'm trying to work on the more advanced tricks, my laptop screen is a bit too small to really watch what's going on. The CEO of all-things-Rhythmball ordered a slew of North America format instructional DVDs, and I'm looking forward to getting mine and practicing Rhythmball in front of our new flat-screen TV. While wearing my new, smaller bra. :)

HARD NUMBERS:

Pants size June 30, 2006: 22
Pants size August 14, 2006: 20 (but fit into size 18 skirts at Old Navy)
Bra size June 30, 2006: tight 42G
Bra size August 14, 2006: 40 DD / 38 G
Overarching Goal: Fit into my black leather pants by Christmas (God bless us, everyone!)

Fitness, Weight Loss, Bra

Snakes on a Rhythmball Paddle

2006-08-11T10:21:00.000-04:00

I cannot WAIT for "Snakes on a Plane." Oh ho, laugh if you will, but in these days of movie plagiarism, this recent offering at least appears 1) new and 2) creative. I am getting very tired of seeing the same movie advertised every decade. From the morphing of "The Cutting Edge" to "Save the Last Dance" to "Step Up," don't the movie studios realize that we aren't spending money to go to the theaters because we've already seen everything they're showing? Like, decades ago?

While I'm ranting, I might as well continue: we saw "Syriana" a couple of nights ago. OK, we saw the first 35 minutes of "Syriana." After the (spoiler) kid died in the swimming pool accident (I blame Al Queda), we turned it off. It was the sloppiest screenwriting I'd ever seen. I could just picture the script meetings:

A: I can't figure out how to tie in the Pakistani guy.
B: That's OK. Just add 10 more characters in 12 different locations. We'll dazzle the audience with our foreign settings.
A: When you say "dazzle," don't you mean "bullsh*t"?
B: You mean there's a difference?
A: But how do I get the audience to care about my characters if I introduce 40 of them in 30 minutes?
B: Kill off Matt Damon's kid. Gets 'em every time.

Frankly, if a movie is going to kill a character who is under the age of 16, there should be a warning label on the box. Because it's really messing with my movie-viewing sensiblity. When DH and I went to see "Me and You and Everyone we Know," I couldn't allow myself to lose myself in the sweetness of it because I was completely convinced that someone was going to get hit by a car. And then, at the end of the movie, nobody did get hit by a car. We watched it again on DVD the other night and I enjoyed it so much more, knowing that nobody was going to meet a tragic end.

Less than a week until "Snakes on a Plane"! To pass the time, I've been leaving Samuel L. Jackson voicemails for people. You can do it, too!

Snakes on a Plane, Unhealthy Obsession, Need to Get Out More

New Proposed Rhythmball Slogan

2006-08-05T12:24:00.000-04:00

"Like Tai Chi, but Funner."

Whaddaya think? Comments, please.

Just when I start feeling good...

2006-08-01T15:15:00.000-04:00

I'm in a drama club of playwrights and actors here in Mytown, and last night we read one of the participant's new plays. She asked me to read the part of the rabbi. "I didn't work too hard to get outside actors to read," she said, "because a lot of the people in the group fit the roles I'm having read." I felt pretty good about being asked to participate until I sat down and read her Dramatis Personae. "Rabbi Adele: hip, slightly frumpy. 40s." And then I wanted to die. Frumpy??? Forty??????!!!!! The only way I got through it was by channeling Jon Lovitz: ACT-ing! I must be a hell of an actress if I can get people to believe I'm frumpy and 40. Yeah, that's it. Uh huh.

Acting, Frumpy, Despair

fAtitude Adjustment

2006-07-31T23:05:00.000-04:00

So I bare my soul yesterday -- OK, my pants size, but the same level of importance -- and I've heard not a *word* in response. Are you all stunned into silence that I was such a fatty?

Let me tell you a little story:
When my best friend was pregnant, she ate family-sized trays of Stouffer's mac-and-cheese and gained 60 pounds. Et moi? I ate right, watched my calories, gave up ice cream halfway through my pregnancy (inside joke), and gained 60 pounds. Granted, the kid weighed nearly nine-and-a-half at birth, so plenty of it was baby-related, but even so? What a p*sser. Plus, during labor they stuffed me full of IV fluids so for days afterwards I looked like the first zeppelin ever to calve.

Unavoidable, but regrettable nonetheless.This new-baby weight in addition to my just-married 20 pounds? Ugh. Paging Fatty McFatterton.

At seven months post-partum I got honest and serious. This extra load is unneccessary and even maybe dangerous. If I got pregnant again, what the h*ll would I wear? Time to dump all the junk from the trunk.

(Of course, it's perfectly FINE if you're post-partum and you're not there yet. My baby's been sleeping through the night for more than three months, so I'm almost as caught up on my rest as I'll ever be. That helps, a lot. Plus, I work for a company that imports exercises and exercise equipment, so it behooves me to learn as much as I can about our product, and it's so much more productive to learn by doing.)

In conclusion: my buddy is in the throes of a medically supervised weight-loss program, by the end of which he will have shed a whole... him. His inspiration is that a lot of really overweight people, after dieting, remain fat. Smaller, but fat. If he's gonna do it, he said, he's going to do it all the way. And I'll have what he's having (but without the nasty "milk"-shakes).

First Month's Progress

2006-07-30T18:52:00.000-04:00

I started this blog and my RR (Rhythmball Regimen) exactly one month ago today. What has the time and effort yielded, you ask? How does my cost-benefit analysis stack up? Pull up a chair:

1) Rhythmball 3-4 times a week, 30 minutes/session
led to
2) Drinking two liters of water daily
led to
3) Sucralose and fat-free half-and-half in my coffee every morning, instead of sugar and half-and-half or some sort of cream
led to
4) At least 500 stomach crunches a week
led to
5) Light beer only
led to
6) Watching less TV (at least two fewer hours each day)
led to
7) Completing at least 12 girlie pushups each night

These activities, coupled with carrying my baby more often than "strolling" him, has granted me the following benefits:
1) Down one pant size
2) Definition in my upper arms and, more importantly, the formerly fat-only bulge between my shoulder and boob
3) Speaking of boobs, at the beginning of RR I fastened my bra at the farthest eyes. Now, I'm using the closest eyes, plus have tightened the straps as much as possible
4) MUCH easier to climb stairs while holding the baby
5) Haven't bumped my hips into anything (doorframe, table) in more than a week

How much weight have I lost? Beats me. I don't have a scale, because they make me weird. I prefer to go by clothing size and fitness level.

HARD NUMBERS:

Pants size June 30, 2006: 22

Pants size July 30, 2006: 20

Bra size June 30, 2006: tight 42G

Bra size July 30, 2006: loose 42G

NEXT MONTH'S GOALS: Down to an 18, master Rhythmball's Set Two, eat more vegetables

OVERARCHING GOAL: Get back into my black leather pants -- preferably by Christmas

Do I work for Rhythmball? Sure. Are the above benefits real or imagined? REAL. And people are beginning to notice, which encourages me to continue.

Rhythmball got me to get up off the couch. What could it do for you???

Weight Loss, Fitness, Kick Ass

Got the World in a Sling

2006-07-28T10:16:00.000-04:00

One of the many helpful things about getting fitter is that it's really helping me lug my baby around. He turned eight months old last week and is weighing in at 24 pounds. I'd been using the stroller in my pre-Rhythmball days, but now that my arms and legs are getting more toned (and my cardiovascular system is getting whipped into shape), I've been putting him in the baby sling and carrying him around on my hip. Yesterday he had a little walk-around modelling gig for a friend who designs baby clothes, and I walked around downtown with him in the sling for 40 minutes. Two months ago, this would not have been possible. He loves the view -- being able to look people in the eye is a real high for him -- and he was so wired by the time we got home it took me 90 minutes to put him down for his nap. I didn't Rhythmball yesterday and was feeling a little guilty about that, until I remembered I'd carried my squirmy, 24-lb. potato sack around town for 40 minutes. Great exercise, that. Angelina Jolie makes it look so easy and now I can, too. :)

Angelina Jolie, Baby Sling, Rhythmball

Progress continues

2006-07-27T13:53:00.000-04:00

Progress is the opposite of congress, and to that end, my Rhythmball regimen is progressing fabulously. I did another thirty minutes of the basic set yesterday and then watch the advanced set on the DVD. It's looking much more do-able than it did when I started. Then, I did so many sets of stomach crunches that by the end of the day, I couldn't remember how many I'd done. At least 200. But the best part was sitting with Darling Husband first thing in the morning and having him look at me and say, "I can tell that you've lost weight." I tell you, hearing that perked me up more than a cup of coffee! Here's to progress!!

More Progress

2006-07-25T14:02:00.000-04:00

I have culled my underwear drawer of maternity panties! Supermodel status, here I come!

The Word for Today

2006-07-22T10:55:00.000-04:00

I have dropped one pant size, and my favorite pre-pregnancy shirt fits again! Thanks, Rhythmball!

VBS is over and Malan is gone...

2006-07-21T19:43:00.000-04:00

Friday, beautiful Friday. The heat is breaking and we're supposed to have some rain this weekend. In other nature news, the bad-ass spider who lives in the space between my window and the screen has added a moth to his already impressive trophy web. He bagged a wasp the other day, which was more gripping than Boa vs. Python, though I felt the battle lacked the humanity of, say, Alien vs. Predator.

Last day of Vacation Bible School, it was, and t'was joyfully endured. Tough keeping tabs on two groups -- 11 fourth graders in one and your now-eight-month-old son in the other. The fourth graders were lovely, really no trouble at all, and quite sweet. Baby's final VBS Nursery feat involved pulling himself up to standing so he could play with a table-top toy. A whole new galaxy of childproofing is opening before me. Yikes.

After waiting two months, the Jake Shimabukuro CD I requested from the Neighboring Library -- "Dragon" -- arrived so I picked it up right before the Mytown Playwrights Lab presentation of my newly revised two-act comedy, "The Wash-n-Dry Laundromat and Uncensored Internet Salon of Salt Lake City, Utah." Or maybe just "Wash-N-Dry." (I think the first one's funnier.) It was a hit! The lab member I wasn't getting any love out of during the reading? When it came time to critique, he not only defended me against another critiquer by invoking my play's structural commonalities with Bertolt Brecht, but summed up with, "if it were funnier you'd have a little Woody Allen movie." So on to draft four, and writing funnier-er.

Gone like VBS is Malan from "Project Runway." He always seemed so creepy and then after hearing, "you're out," he turned all vulnerable outsider on us. Which makes me sorry he's going. Jeffrey is still in it, and I'm dying to write an estranged friend from forever about his opinions on Jeffrey's professional comeback after mental health issues, but I'm afraid Jeffrey's meltdown is going to be spectacular so I'm kind of waiting to see how Jeffrey fares before making any suggestions. There will always be the DVD release of Season Three, maybe just before Christmas?

I also want to ask Matt Roloff what he and his think of the new Burger King ad campaign. I don't know why BK went with miniaturized little people. Wouldn't miniaturized tall people better convey the bigness of the new BK stackable burgers? Isn't making the characters little people just... gratuitous? And, well, stupid?

Sometimes I just shake my head and then I sit down to blog.

They took a bunch of pictures of me playing Rhythmball with VBS kids. Yowza. It's time to get some non-maternity clothes -- mine, they're too big! While it's true that I thought I look better than I actually do -- never a comfortable feeling -- my shirts balloon from where my body stops, which I'm interpreting as a good thing.

Now if some of my tomato blossoms would just turn into baby tomatoes, I'd be freakin' set.

And Rhythmball is about to get its first press! It's super fun. And those who know me know that if there's one thing I know, people, it's Super Fun. So buy one, already.

Matt Roloff, Project Runway, Jake Shimabukuro, Rhythmball

How it's Going

2006-07-19T12:56:00.000-04:00

This week I've been helping out at our church's Vacation Bible School (VBS). I've done this for many years in many churches throughout the nation, and I have hit upon a Universal Truth thereof: Vacation Bible School always falls on the hottest week of the year. It never fails.

So I pack up the baby at 8:00 every morning and we toddle down to church, where he gets to play in the nursery and I get to watch first nine, then 10, and now 11 third and fourth graders. I'm only the assistant, but I still get the perks -- today three kids gifted me with their art projects.

You might think that the heat and the VBS has thrown off my Rhythmball schedule. You couldn't be further from the truth. I took my paddles and balls and taught a couple of the kids to play during snack time yesterday. The kids did OK but our head teacher really picked it up. Last night Darling Husband was out so I cleared the family room of all the baby detritus and practiced right- and left-handed Rhythmball technique. Turns out I've been holding the racquet incorrectly, so I need to relearn how to do that (you keep your palm empty, gripping the racket in a pinch between thumb and index finger, and then your other fingers follow down from that). The new grip is foreign but it REALLY helps with the range-of-motion, so I'll stick with it. I did more than 100 stomach crunches, including some lateral crunches and double crunches (ouch!), and some push ups. It was a great way to watch "Veronica Mars," which I'm trying to get into but there are too many characters and way too many plotlines.

My water intake has gone insane with the heat -- I'm drinking at least two liters a day, sometimes three. I've been at it for a couple of weeks now and it's making a huge difference in my skin's clarity. Glad something is!

Learning the Tai Chi Way

2006-07-15T22:18:00.000-04:00

I've been doing a lot of research about Tai Chi and those associated with it. My favorite reference nugget thus far is an interview with Grand Master Alex Anatole, who runs the Center of Traditional Taoist Studies outside of Boston, MA. He was interviewed by our local Cn8 network about his book, The Truth of Tao, hardand the newscaster began by saying how it seemed in his book, Anatole was saying that for most people, life sucks and then you die.

"No, for all of us." Anatole clarified.

His facto reminded me of the woman I heard of who awakens every morning and prays, "whatever," then goes to bed at night and prays, "oh well."

Tai Chi is softness turned against hardness. There's some of that in every philosophy, religion, or dogma, I suppose. But it's amazing to take that to your heart and mind, and then create a physical manifestation.

Tai Chi, Daily Life

Salad Nights

2006-07-14T10:07:00.000-04:00

One hundred stomach crunches this morning: two sets of 50. And last night, for dinner, I ate SALAD. For dinner. Yeah! Granted, after Protein-a-Go-Go the night before, my body was crying for green leafy goodness. The exciting thing is, I complied.

Throughout the whole week I've been drinking troughsful of water -- at least two litres a day. I'm hoping that it will help clear up my skin, which is going through a rough patch. Lots of rough patches. We'll see.

High Steaks

2006-07-13T21:05:00.000-04:00

Yes, this will work around to the Rhythmball content of the day, but woman does not live by Rhythmball alone...

Darling Husband (DH) and I received a $100 AmEx reward certificate for Morton's the Steakhouse back in January that was suddenly due to expire, so we called a sitter and made dinner reservations. Sitter was 45 minutes later than expected, and Nick and Em were ready to drop everything to come watch the baby, and then the sitter arrived. I find that it usually just takes a moment of panic in order for everything to work out OK. We were very excited to rush out in the rainstorm to drive to one-hour-away Hartford, capitol of insurance, and did so with great glee. By the time we hit our onramp we'd finished talking about eBay for the first time in four days (exaggeration!) and concentrated on having a fun married date. The only nice clothes I had to wear were from the pregnancy, and I'm pleased to announce that they fit considerably larger than last time I wore 'em. I ended up tucking in the blouse and folding over the wide waistband, which I belted with a satin bathrobe sash. Very Project Runway. Hey, I ironed it first.

After combing a three-block radius, we found parking and wandered the food court till we went outside and found the entrance. We were seated in a lovely booth, perhaps the worse booth in the place but better than the places restaurants usually try to stick us. It's OK, the sous-chef was natty and I liked the French tile.

Our waiter started with the name Owen but later switched to Noah. Or maybe I just didn't hear him right the first time, which is possible because in the adjacent booth sat this man whose voice was so deep it could have carried water. His date was 35 and much more attractive than her date, which made me inclined to like them. We couldn't help overhearing him as he explained how Amsterdam works, with the coffee bars and such. The lady was incredulous, and either she was a really good actress or else she was the most sheltered woman on the planet.

Owen/Noah told us about the tableside soufflé, and I asked him if they made a Harlequin one, and then I told him that's a swirl of chocolate and Grand Marnier, and Chef said OK, which was great.

Deep background: Back in 1994 John and I were at our legendary Best Friend Christmas Dinner at Il Fornaio in San Jose; I ordered the biggest steak that they had, and now whenever John tells the story he increases the steak's weight by another 8 ounces and never fails to end it with, "and she ate the whole thing, and the waiters were afraid."

Last night, (DH) read from the menu board that a 48 oz. Porterhouse was in the offing.

"For two," he clarified. So we split it. The tuxedoed head waiter carved it tableside and his bow-tie was askew the rest of the night.

Somewhere during the meal I overheard her: "are you stoned?" him: "yes." her: "all night?"

I went to the restroom and the date next door was washing her hands.

"I don't know how long you two have been seeing each other..." I began.

"Yes?" Her surprise evinced her New Englandness.

"You're adorable."

As they left, the guy raised his eyebrow at me as a showing of thanks. I was happy to help.

Why am I telling you this? Because I need to do my crunches, and it's already the next day. But I DID show Nick and Em my Basic Sets Rhythmball routine, and they were super-impressed. They even said "oooh!" when I completed three consecutive under-the-leg throws. So apparently my practice is indeed making perfect. And my old maternity clothes need to be stitched into something that fits, so it’s beginning to pay off where it really counts: my childborne hips!

Rhythmball, Project Runway, Morton's the Steakhouse

Rhythmball=Rain Dance???

2006-07-11T11:10:00.000-04:00

I went to my garden this morning, Miracle-Gro in one hand and Rhythmball paddle in the other. After talking to my garden neighbor Susan, who enjoys betting people a dollar that they can't guess how old my baby is (nobody's taken cash from her yet), about the community's disparagment about M-G (lots of organic types around, apparently), I dosed my veggies and sat in my donated chair, watching things grow and weeding within arm's reach. After I finished my coffee I decided to put my Rhythmball skills to the test: I went to the central area of the garden, near the tool shed, and started swingin'. This was the first time I'd Rhythmballed in public and I have to say, I surprised myself with how well I did. Even managed some under-the-leg tricks! And, by the time I was done, I'd made it rain! Hope it doesn't wash all my Miracle-Gro away!

Rhythmball, Daily Life, Gardening

Monday Monday

2006-07-10T16:40:00.000-04:00

Where did last week go? Oh yeah. Baby care. On Thursday we went to Hell and back, otherwise known as Connecticut. :) That's the site of the closest Babies'R'Us store. One is opening in our mall come August, but our baby has outgrown his swing and his playpen (all this at seven months, yes) so we had to buy some new items. He is now the proud owner of an exersaucer and a Superyard, kind of like a dog run but for babies. He's very pleased, and I'm delighted that it limits the amount of childproofing we'll have to do. NOTE: the baby pictured is not my baby. I think he's sold separately.

I'd been doing most of my Rhythmball practice while baby naps, but yesterday when he was exersaucering I figured I'd give it a go. I started swinging my arm and letting the ball catch a little air. Baby was not only transfixed, but promptly began laughing his little bottom off. Hi-larious. I'm also practicing left-handed Rhythmball so I can tone equally, but I'm not doing that while baby's in the room because my coordination is not quite childproof.

In additon to Rhythmball, I've set a new goal of 500 stomach crunches a week. That works out to about 75/day. I've done it for the last two days and am already sensing improvement. I was able to do 40 in a row this morning, rather than 3.5 sets of 20. Whoo! Feel the burn!

Technorati tags: Rhythmball, Daily Life, Blog

Back to It

2006-07-05T08:56:00.000-04:00

After a couple days of Independence from my self-improvement kick, I awoke this morning and gave in to my urge to do crunches. Did sixty of them before succumbing to the smell of morning coffee. But it's a start, right? One of these days I hope to actually feel my ribs. I know they're in there somewhere. Continued Rhythmball practice should help, as well as my eat-more-healthy-and-less-garbage goals.

Today I am continuing on with my goals of beautification. I will be getting my hair cut and intend to walk out of the salon looking like Storm from X3, minus the grays. My hair is actually much darker than usual due to a horrific hair-dye-at-home accident. It didn't make the papers, though it's nearly that wretched. At least it covered the grays. In the meanwhile, I'm washing my hair every day with dandruff shampoo, in hopes of stripping away some of the darkness. It's kind of working.

Husband and baby gave me a big day-spa gift certificate that I'm hoping to redeem today as well -- a collagen facial and a thermal manicure, mmmmm. And perhaps I'll see "The Devil Wears Prada" with a girlfriend (I understand it's a modern-day _Paradise Lost_, only with Meryl Streep in place of the snake). Hoping it will be a lovely, girly day.

Technorati tags: Rhythmball,Postpartum,The Devil Wears Prada

The Strangest Thing

2006-07-02T17:19:00.000-04:00

I awoke this morning with a desire to do stomach crunches. Fortunately, by the time I'd had a cup of coffee, the urge had passed. Maybe tomorrow...

The Rhythmball practice is going swimmingly. I forgot about the DVD today and just did half an hour of freestyle Rhythmball to an old "Roseanne" episode I'd taped -- one that I didn't think would ever be on TV again, because it's Roseanne battling terrorists on a train. Steven Segal appears as her spirit guide. Good stuff. Went great with Rhythmball. And I can do the under-leg throw with both my right AND my left leg now. Woo hoo! By the time I was done with 30 minutes of exercise, I could actually notice the change in the muscle definition down the outside of my thigh, by my knee. Stranger than fiction, people!

White Rabbit!

2006-07-01T10:31:00.000-04:00

My mom's mom always used to wake up on the first of the month and say "White Rabbit." She said it ensures you'll have good luck the whole month through. When I was engaged to my husband I said "White Rabbit" one morning and he looked at me as though I'd gone insane. I guess other peoples' families don't say it. Unless yours does...

Anyway, I awoke this morning, said "white rabbit," and realized that I was actually looking forward to doing my Rhythmball practice. I am in no way an exerciser, so this is a strange and foreign (redundancy to underscore just how strange and foreign this feeling was) feeling. I plugged the DVD into my laptop again and swung along with Mr. Ji. There were two parts of the basic action set I could not get the hang of yesterday: the under-leg throw and the behind-the-body throw. Today I actually accomplished a couple of under-leg throws! Time spent analyzing the behind-the-body throw was spent in vain, however. I think that one might have to wait until I have less weight behind my body. :) Twenty minutes of Rhythmballing (does that sound dirty?) later and I had worked up a good, healthy sweat and saw roses in my cheeks. I was so excited that I sat down to blog to you good people about it.

Now it's time to shower before baby awakens from his cranky-time nap. He pushed himself up to sitting from his belly yesterday! I figure he'll be ready for his own baby Rhythmball exercise equipment by next month. OK, maybe the month after that.

The Rhythmballing Begins!

2006-06-30T09:29:00.000-04:00

I received my Rhythmball exercise equipment today: a Rhythmball paddle, cute yellow ball, and DVD featuring Liu Jia Ji (so says the back of the DVD jewel case). Dad said that the Rhythmball learning curve was minimal and I didn't really believe him; I'm not exactly the most coordinated person on the planet. But the demonstration was helpful and pretty soon I was swingin' my arm and keeping the ball on the paddle AT THE SAME TIME, woo hoo!

I went through the "Basic Action" demonstration a couple of times and was feeling pretty confident at the end of 40 minutes. Yeah, I got some exercise by lunging (lunge-ing?) down to pick up my cute yellow ball, much to the joy of Jasmine the cat, but it really wasn't that difficult to follow along with the DVD professor and it was a lot of fun, too! By the end of it I was sweating with exertion (the A/C was on and everything), and felt like I'd done some good exercise. Good thing, considering that my baby is now seven months old and I've barely lost half of the weight I gained while pregnant. Rhythmball, here I come!

Technorati tags: Rhythmball,
Postpartum