The Word for Today

I have dropped one pant size, and my favorite pre-pregnancy shirt fits again! Thanks, Rhythmball!

VBS is over and Malan is gone...

Friday, beautiful Friday. The heat is breaking and we're supposed to have some rain this weekend. In other nature news, the bad-ass spider who lives in the space between my window and the screen has added a moth to his already impressive trophy web. He bagged a wasp the other day, which was more gripping than Boa vs. Python, though I felt the battle lacked the humanity of, say, Alien vs. Predator.

Last day of Vacation Bible School, it was, and t'was joyfully endured. Tough keeping tabs on two groups -- 11 fourth graders in one and your now-eight-month-old son in the other. The fourth graders were lovely, really no trouble at all, and quite sweet. Baby's final VBS Nursery feat involved pulling himself up to standing so he could play with a table-top toy. A whole new galaxy of childproofing is opening before me. Yikes.

After waiting two months, the Jake Shimabukuro CD I requested from the Neighboring Library -- "Dragon" -- arrived so I picked it up right before the Mytown Playwrights Lab presentation of my newly revised two-act comedy, "The Wash-n-Dry Laundromat and Uncensored Internet Salon of Salt Lake City, Utah." Or maybe just "Wash-N-Dry." (I think the first one's funnier.) It was a hit! The lab member I wasn't getting any love out of during the reading? When it came time to critique, he not only defended me against another critiquer by invoking my play's structural commonalities with Bertolt Brecht, but summed up with, "if it were funnier you'd have a little Woody Allen movie." So on to draft four, and writing funnier-er.

Gone like VBS is Malan from "Project Runway." He always seemed so creepy and then after hearing, "you're out," he turned all vulnerable outsider on us. Which makes me sorry he's going. Jeffrey is still in it, and I'm dying to write an estranged friend from forever about his opinions on Jeffrey's professional comeback after mental health issues, but I'm afraid Jeffrey's meltdown is going to be spectacular so I'm kind of waiting to see how Jeffrey fares before making any suggestions. There will always be the DVD release of Season Three, maybe just before Christmas?

I also want to ask Matt Roloff what he and his think of the new Burger King ad campaign. I don't know why BK went with miniaturized little people. Wouldn't miniaturized tall people better convey the bigness of the new BK stackable burgers? Isn't making the characters little people just... gratuitous? And, well, stupid?

Sometimes I just shake my head and then I sit down to blog.

They took a bunch of pictures of me playing Rhythmball with VBS kids. Yowza. It's time to get some non-maternity clothes -- mine, they're too big! While it's true that I thought I look better than I actually do -- never a comfortable feeling -- my shirts balloon from where my body stops, which I'm interpreting as a good thing.

Now if some of my tomato blossoms would just turn into baby tomatoes, I'd be freakin' set.

And Rhythmball is about to get its first press! It's super fun. And those who know me know that if there's one thing I know, people, it's Super Fun. So buy one, already.

Matt Roloff, Project Runway, Jake Shimabukuro, Rhythmball

How it's Going

This week I've been helping out at our church's Vacation Bible School (VBS). I've done this for many years in many churches throughout the nation, and I have hit upon a Universal Truth thereof: Vacation Bible School always falls on the hottest week of the year. It never fails.

So I pack up the baby at 8:00 every morning and we toddle down to church, where he gets to play in the nursery and I get to watch first nine, then 10, and now 11 third and fourth graders. I'm only the assistant, but I still get the perks -- today three kids gifted me with their art projects.

You might think that the heat and the VBS has thrown off my Rhythmball schedule. You couldn't be further from the truth. I took my paddles and balls and taught a couple of the kids to play during snack time yesterday. The kids did OK but our head teacher really picked it up. Last night Darling Husband was out so I cleared the family room of all the baby detritus and practiced right- and left-handed Rhythmball technique. Turns out I've been holding the racquet incorrectly, so I need to relearn how to do that (you keep your palm empty, gripping the racket in a pinch between thumb and index finger, and then your other fingers follow down from that). The new grip is foreign but it REALLY helps with the range-of-motion, so I'll stick with it. I did more than 100 stomach crunches, including some lateral crunches and double crunches (ouch!), and some push ups. It was a great way to watch "Veronica Mars," which I'm trying to get into but there are too many characters and way too many plotlines.

My water intake has gone insane with the heat -- I'm drinking at least two liters a day, sometimes three. I've been at it for a couple of weeks now and it's making a huge difference in my skin's clarity. Glad something is!

Learning the Tai Chi Way

I've been doing a lot of research about Tai Chi and those associated with it. My favorite reference nugget thus far is an interview with Grand Master Alex Anatole, who runs the Center of Traditional Taoist Studies outside of Boston, MA. He was interviewed by our local Cn8 network about his book, The Truth of Tao, hardand the newscaster began by saying how it seemed in his book, Anatole was saying that for most people, life sucks and then you die.

"No, for all of us." Anatole clarified.

His facto reminded me of the woman I heard of who awakens every morning and prays, "whatever," then goes to bed at night and prays, "oh well."

Tai Chi is softness turned against hardness. There's some of that in every philosophy, religion, or dogma, I suppose. But it's amazing to take that to your heart and mind, and then create a physical manifestation.

Tai Chi, Daily Life

Salad Nights

One hundred stomach crunches this morning: two sets of 50. And last night, for dinner, I ate SALAD. For dinner. Yeah! Granted, after Protein-a-Go-Go the night before, my body was crying for green leafy goodness. The exciting thing is, I complied.

Throughout the whole week I've been drinking troughsful of water -- at least two litres a day. I'm hoping that it will help clear up my skin, which is going through a rough patch. Lots of rough patches. We'll see.

High Steaks

Yes, this will work around to the Rhythmball content of the day, but woman does not live by Rhythmball alone...

Darling Husband (DH) and I received a $100 AmEx reward certificate for Morton's the Steakhouse back in January that was suddenly due to expire, so we called a sitter and made dinner reservations. Sitter was 45 minutes later than expected, and Nick and Em were ready to drop everything to come watch the baby, and then the sitter arrived. I find that it usually just takes a moment of panic in order for everything to work out OK. We were very excited to rush out in the rainstorm to drive to one-hour-away Hartford, capitol of insurance, and did so with great glee. By the time we hit our onramp we'd finished talking about eBay for the first time in four days (exaggeration!) and concentrated on having a fun married date. The only nice clothes I had to wear were from the pregnancy, and I'm pleased to announce that they fit considerably larger than last time I wore 'em. I ended up tucking in the blouse and folding over the wide waistband, which I belted with a satin bathrobe sash. Very Project Runway. Hey, I ironed it first.

After combing a three-block radius, we found parking and wandered the food court till we went outside and found the entrance. We were seated in a lovely booth, perhaps the worse booth in the place but better than the places restaurants usually try to stick us. It's OK, the sous-chef was natty and I liked the French tile.

Our waiter started with the name Owen but later switched to Noah. Or maybe I just didn't hear him right the first time, which is possible because in the adjacent booth sat this man whose voice was so deep it could have carried water. His date was 35 and much more attractive than her date, which made me inclined to like them. We couldn't help overhearing him as he explained how Amsterdam works, with the coffee bars and such. The lady was incredulous, and either she was a really good actress or else she was the most sheltered woman on the planet.

Owen/Noah told us about the tableside soufflé, and I asked him if they made a Harlequin one, and then I told him that's a swirl of chocolate and Grand Marnier, and Chef said OK, which was great.

Deep background: Back in 1994 John and I were at our legendary Best Friend Christmas Dinner at Il Fornaio in San Jose; I ordered the biggest steak that they had, and now whenever John tells the story he increases the steak's weight by another 8 ounces and never fails to end it with, "and she ate the whole thing, and the waiters were afraid."

Last night, (DH) read from the menu board that a 48 oz. Porterhouse was in the offing.

"For two," he clarified. So we split it. The tuxedoed head waiter carved it tableside and his bow-tie was askew the rest of the night.

Somewhere during the meal I overheard her: "are you stoned?" him: "yes." her: "all night?"

I went to the restroom and the date next door was washing her hands.

"I don't know how long you two have been seeing each other..." I began.

"Yes?" Her surprise evinced her New Englandness.

"You're adorable."

As they left, the guy raised his eyebrow at me as a showing of thanks. I was happy to help.

Why am I telling you this? Because I need to do my crunches, and it's already the next day. But I DID show Nick and Em my Basic Sets Rhythmball routine, and they were super-impressed. They even said "oooh!" when I completed three consecutive under-the-leg throws. So apparently my practice is indeed making perfect. And my old maternity clothes need to be stitched into something that fits, so it’s beginning to pay off where it really counts: my childborne hips!

Rhythmball, Project Runway, Morton's the Steakhouse

Rhythmball=Rain Dance???

I went to my garden this morning, Miracle-Gro in one hand and Rhythmball paddle in the other. After talking to my garden neighbor Susan, who enjoys betting people a dollar that they can't guess how old my baby is (nobody's taken cash from her yet), about the community's disparagment about M-G (lots of organic types around, apparently), I dosed my veggies and sat in my donated chair, watching things grow and weeding within arm's reach. After I finished my coffee I decided to put my Rhythmball skills to the test: I went to the central area of the garden, near the tool shed, and started swingin'. This was the first time I'd Rhythmballed in public and I have to say, I surprised myself with how well I did. Even managed some under-the-leg tricks! And, by the time I was done, I'd made it rain! Hope it doesn't wash all my Miracle-Gro away!

Rhythmball, Daily Life, Gardening

Monday Monday

Where did last week go? Oh yeah. Baby care. On Thursday we went to Hell and back, otherwise known as Connecticut. :) That's the site of the closest Babies'R'Us store. One is opening in our mall come August, but our baby has outgrown his swing and his playpen (all this at seven months, yes) so we had to buy some new items. He is now the proud owner of an exersaucer and a Superyard, kind of like a dog run but for babies. He's very pleased, and I'm delighted that it limits the amount of childproofing we'll have to do. NOTE: the baby pictured is not my baby. I think he's sold separately.

I'd been doing most of my Rhythmball practice while baby naps, but yesterday when he was exersaucering I figured I'd give it a go. I started swinging my arm and letting the ball catch a little air. Baby was not only transfixed, but promptly began laughing his little bottom off. Hi-larious. I'm also practicing left-handed Rhythmball so I can tone equally, but I'm not doing that while baby's in the room because my coordination is not quite childproof.

In additon to Rhythmball, I've set a new goal of 500 stomach crunches a week. That works out to about 75/day. I've done it for the last two days and am already sensing improvement. I was able to do 40 in a row this morning, rather than 3.5 sets of 20. Whoo! Feel the burn!

Technorati tags: Rhythmball, Daily Life, Blog

Back to It

After a couple days of Independence from my self-improvement kick, I awoke this morning and gave in to my urge to do crunches. Did sixty of them before succumbing to the smell of morning coffee. But it's a start, right? One of these days I hope to actually feel my ribs. I know they're in there somewhere. Continued Rhythmball practice should help, as well as my eat-more-healthy-and-less-garbage goals.

Today I am continuing on with my goals of beautification. I will be getting my hair cut and intend to walk out of the salon looking like Storm from X3, minus the grays. My hair is actually much darker than usual due to a horrific hair-dye-at-home accident. It didn't make the papers, though it's nearly that wretched. At least it covered the grays. In the meanwhile, I'm washing my hair every day with dandruff shampoo, in hopes of stripping away some of the darkness. It's kind of working.

Husband and baby gave me a big day-spa gift certificate that I'm hoping to redeem today as well -- a collagen facial and a thermal manicure, mmmmm. And perhaps I'll see "The Devil Wears Prada" with a girlfriend (I understand it's a modern-day _Paradise Lost_, only with Meryl Streep in place of the snake). Hoping it will be a lovely, girly day.

Technorati tags: Rhythmball,Postpartum,The Devil Wears Prada

The Strangest Thing

I awoke this morning with a desire to do stomach crunches. Fortunately, by the time I'd had a cup of coffee, the urge had passed. Maybe tomorrow...

The Rhythmball practice is going swimmingly. I forgot about the DVD today and just did half an hour of freestyle Rhythmball to an old "Roseanne" episode I'd taped -- one that I didn't think would ever be on TV again, because it's Roseanne battling terrorists on a train. Steven Segal appears as her spirit guide. Good stuff. Went great with Rhythmball. And I can do the under-leg throw with both my right AND my left leg now. Woo hoo! By the time I was done with 30 minutes of exercise, I could actually notice the change in the muscle definition down the outside of my thigh, by my knee. Stranger than fiction, people!